The Strength of a Handshake

Have you ever considered the strength of a handshake? I'm not talking about the power that some people love to put into the actual handshake itself. You know. Some people love to give the "dead fish" limp handshake, while others grab your hand so hard that you sometimes want to cry, "uncle". I'm talking about the actual significance and meaning of shaking hands. Let's consider two texts from the Book of Proverbs.

Proverbs 6:1-2a, "My son, if you become surety for your friend, if you have shaken hands in pledge for a stranger, you are snared by the words of your mouth;"

Proverbs 17:18, "A man devoid of understanding shakes hands in a pledge, and becomes surety for his friend."

To help us understand the Biblical context, "become surety", it means to guarantee a loan, or put up security for a friend's debt. The words "devoid of understanding" in the other verse means, without good sense or using poor judgment. What then are the verses actually talking about? The emphasis is on the danger of becoming the guarantor for the debt of someone else, and that once you do that you are obligated to pay it whether you have the funds or not. What about guaranteeing a loan made it so binding? It was the "shaking of hands". Shaking hands when the mouth makes a promise was considered as the ratification of a commitment. That is where I came up with the title, the Strength of a Handshake.

The Bible references shaking hands back to the days of the early Kings of Israel. Archeological evidence has also demonstrated that shaking hands can be found as far back as the 5th Century B.C. An engraving was discovered that shows two Greek soldiers shaking hands. The handshake is initiated when the two hands touch. It is commonly done upon meeting, greeting, parting, offering congratulations, expressing gratitude, or completing an agreement. In sports or other competitive activities, it is also done as a sign of good sportsmanship. Its purpose is to convey trust, balance and equality. Its practice continues to this day.

You may be wondering what this has to do with Ethics. I'm sure you have heard the statement, "An honest man's word is as good as his bond." This was first used in print in Cervantes work, "Don Quixote". Its meaning, as defined in the text in Proverbs, has not changed. When a person gives his word to do something, it is his guarantee that he will do it. The guarantee was sealed with a handshake.

Is this how business promises are guaranteed today? Of course not. Today, you need contracts with such complicated wording that only lawyers can understand. Have contracts helped? Not necessarily. People break contracts, companies break contracts. In fact contracts today are only worth as much as the paper they are written upon. When there are contractual disputes, lawyers and courts get involved, and sometimes the contract is upheld, and sometimes it isn't.

Do you remember the day, when a man's word was his bond? When did it stop? Why isn't it true anymore? Should it still be true? Of course it should be. It's simply about keeping your word. Do you think that maybe when Situational Ethics was starting to be taught in the 60's that "the ends justify the means" that keeping our word started becoming old fashioned? When you say you are going to do something, just do it. Each of us has the opportunity to make a deep and lasting impression by simply keeping our word. This concept is not "old fashioned" and "out of date". It is a fundamental principle of ethics. It is the essence of integrity. Whether it's us as individuals or collectively as a company, our integrity is measured by our ability to keep our word. Unfortunately today's culture is rampant with lying, promise breaking, swindling, cheating by both individuals as well as companies, and throughout the political arena. No one trusts anyone anymore. Why does it have to be this way? Does it have to be this way? Call me naive, but I do not believe it does.

Would you like to gain a competitive edge in your market, in your family, in your corner of the world? I believe keeping your word will do more to grow your business than any business training, business plan, guru training, etc. ever will. It will make you stand out in any field. Being known as a person of your word will be like a breath of fresh air in today's society.

Is it easy to keep your word? Unfortunately, not always. I believe most people would say, "I keep my word", but look deep within yourself, do you always keep it? Are there times that you may fudge things just a little, overpromise something, twist a word or two to your advantage? I will gladly be the first to raise my hand and say I'm as guilty as anyone else, but that doesn't make it right. Being truthful, keeping your word takes time. I think it first takes an attitudinal adjustment inside of a person. We need to recognize that being truthful is our goal and be committed to keeping our word. What happens when we slip and don't keep our word? Acknowledge it, learn from it, and move on. We are all a "work in progress". Why not start today to set out to keep your word, if you say you are going to do something, do it, regardless of the immediate consequences.

How do you want to be remembered?