Asking for Advice

Do you seek advice from others?  When it comes time to make one of life's major decisions, do you ask for advice, or are you one that prefers just to make decisions relying on your "gut"?  Can you look back at decisions you've made at different times in your life, where you can now say, 'I wish I had followed the advice I was given?'  Have you ever been asked to give your advice only to discover that once you've given it, the person or persons you gave it too, resented it?  Asking for advice is harder for some people than others.  In today's blog, let's take a closer look at this topic and see how it is addressed in the Book of Proverbs, and how it relates to Business Ethics.

Proverbs 11:14:  "Where there is no counsel, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety."

In this passage we discover two primary reasons why we should ask for advice.  It will keep you from falling.  Literally, it can and will keep you from making wrong business and personal decisions.  It goes on to say that there is safety in seeking counsel from multiple sources.  In other words, if you are about to make a life decision that could alter the course of your life or the lives of those in your circle of influence, asking for advice from a number of people will improve the prospects of making the right decision.  For example, if I get a diagnosis from a Doctor, it is expected that you will get a second or even third opinion.  If I need financial advice, I should seek the advice of more than one financial adviser. 

Who should you listen to and get advice from?  There is a danger in getting wrong advice too.  Who can give you the help, advice and the emotional support you need in achieving your goals?  Anyone can give advice, but with the advice given and received, how can we know it is the right advice?  Let's take friends and family.  They are usually the ones that we most often turn to for advice.  As well intentioned as they may be, do they have the particular life experiences that you are seeking advice for?  Their motives and intentions are good, but like all of us, they see the world through their own fears, faults and failures.  They are guided by their own feelings.  They may be sincere with the advice they give, but they may very easily be sincerely wrong.  Following their advice may lead you down a wrong path, and it may be because they are not experienced with the topic you need advice on.  Using the examples in the previous paragraph, if you get a bad diagnosis from your doctor, you are not going to your mechanic for a second opinion, or if you are looking for financial advice, you are not going to turn to a friend or family member that can't pay their bills.
 
Proverbs 12:15:  "The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but he who heeds counsel is wise."

Proverbs 16:9:  "A man's heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps."

Proverbs 20:18:  "Plans are established by counsel."

These verses show us that we should ask for advice because sometimes our way, as right as it seems to us, is wrong.  For some, that may seem harsh but it needs to be said.  We make plans.  We ignore advice.  We think in our gut that our plans are secure.  Then what happens?  Too often, we jump into something based on a unilateral decision that we make on our own, only to find out that it was a mistake.

Proverbs 15:22:  "Without counsel, plans go awry, but in the multitude of counselors they are established."

Proverbs 21:5:  "The plans of the diligent lead surely to plenty, but those of everyone who is hasty, surely to poverty."

Even after you have sought advice, and have made your decision with the help you received from that advice, continuing to ask for counsel is recommended.  Why?  Even good plans, solid plans can easily get off course.  Maybe early on you received some great advice that helped you make a decision initially, but over time, you start thinking that you have the answers, and you change course hastily or in midstream, and then bingo, you veer off course.

Here are 3 things you should ask yourself before seeking advice.

1. Are you looking for advice or validation?  Don't bother asking for advice if all you are looking for is approval.  There are times we have already made up our minds about a decision, and we are just looking for someone that will agree with our decision.  That is not really asking for advice.
2. Are you ready for the truth?  Seeking advice without an open mind is like mining for gold while blindfolded.  Sometimes the truth hurts.  If you are not ready to face the truth, don't bother seeking advice.
3. Are you ignoring advice out of emotion, logic or pride?  Someone gives you advice.  You don't like it.  It irritates you.  You ask yourself why you asked for it.  It's not what you wanted to hear.  You ultimately reject it.

How does this apply to Business Ethics?  Is it not obvious how?  If we would learn to seek advice from trusted, reliable sources with regards to ethical and moral issues, we could save ourselves from a lot of pain and grief from making wrong business and personal decisions.   I will go another step.  For those reading this blog who believe God's Word is the ultimate source for advice, you have the added advantage of not only getting advice based on the human experiences of those who give the advice, but you also have the added security of getting solid spiritual advice found throughout the Bible.

Coming next week:
You should have listened, but you didn't listen to the advice that was offered.  Now, you are faced with the consequences of making and now living with a bad decision.  How do you recover?  I will offer some suggestions in next week's post.